The Art of Letting Go

Life Lessons from the Practice of Yin Yoga

One of the reasons I love teaching Yin Yoga is that it's so much more than a physical practice. Within the stillness and simplicity of these long, quiet holds are some of life's most profound lessons.

When we settle into a Yin posture, the invitation isn't to hold our breath, grit our teeth, and wait for it to be over. It's to soften in the presence of discomfort. To welcome each passing sensation, thought, and emotion without needing to resist, fix, or control it.

As we linger in these postures, we begin to notice our habitual responses. Do we grip? Resist? Hold our breath? Wish the moment away?

Or can we soften? Breathe? Trust? Allow?

Sometimes, just on the other side of that resistance, a beautiful release is waiting to happen. And sometimes, the greatest lesson is simply learning to be with what is, without needing it to change.

This is where the real yoga begins.

Because life will inevitably bring us challenges we didn't choose, circumstances we cannot control, and moments that push us beyond our comfort zone.

But while we cannot always choose what happens to us, we can practice choosing how we respond.

Every time we choose to soften instead of resist, to remain present instead of retreating into old patterns, we create the possibility for something new.

In yoga philosophy, these deeply ingrained patterns are called samskaras—impressions left by our past experiences that shape how we perceive ourselves and respond to the world.

Modern neuroscience offers a fascinating parallel through the concept of neuroplasticity—the brain's ability to change and form new connections through experience and repetition.

What a beautiful reminder that our patterns are not necessarily permanent. Through awareness, intention, and practice, we can begin to loosen the hold of old habits and create new ways of being.

We don't have to keep living inside the same old stories.

We can loosen our grip on the past, release the need to control every moment, and open ourselves to the possibility of something new, right here, right now.

To me, this is the heart of yoga.

Not just becoming more flexible in our bodies, but becoming more flexible in our minds. Learning to meet life as it is rather than constantly fighting against it. Discovering that we can be both strong and soft, grounded and open, courageous and accepting.

And perhaps most importantly, remembering that sometimes our greatest strength comes not from holding on, but from knowing when to let go.

Isvara Pranidhana: Surrender to a Higher Power

In the first aphorism of the second pada of Patanjali’s Yoga Sutras, he explains the 3 “kriyas,” or actions required for one on the path of yoga. The first two of these, “tapas” (self-discipline) and “svadhyaya” (self-study), I discussed in previous posts. In this post, I will discuss the third and final action which is “isvara pranidhana” or surrender to something bigger than ourselves.

A big part of living an authentic spiritual life is learning to live in alignment with your highest values, but in order to do that, you first have to determine what those values are. What gives your life meaning? For many of us, this might be our felt connection to God, the universe, or a higher power of some sort. For some, it might simply be the feeling of being connected to the flow of life within us and around us. For others, this might be our feeling of serving a higher purpose.

On our hardest days, knowing that we are part of something bigger and feeling that our life has meaning can give us the faith to continue moving forward. Indicated in the word “pranidhana” is the idea of surrender, or a releasing of control. This is the recognition that no matter how good our intentions are and how hard we work, there will always be a lot of things that are completely out of our control. All that we can do in this life is to give our best, and then we must step back and let go and trust that whatever comes is for our highest good.

We can’t always see the bigger picture or know how the small inconveniences today might ultimately shape into something better for us in the long run, so there is an element of faith required in order to maintain a balanced state of mind (a state of yoga).

These three qualities of self-discipline, self-study, and surrender to something bigger than ourselves are described beautifully in the Serenity Prayer:

“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change” (isvara pranidhana), “the courage to change the things I can” (tapas), “and the wisdom to know the difference” (svadhyaya).

Svadhyaya: Self Study

In the first aphorism of the second pada of Patanjali’s Yoga Sutras, he explains the 3 “kriyas,” or actions required for one on the spiritual path of yoga. The first of these is “tapas” (self-discipline) which I discussed in my last post. In this post, I will discuss the second action which is svadhyaya, or self study.

Patanjali tells us that it’s not enough to simply show up and work hard; we must also self-reflect. It is of no use to work hard if you are working hard in the wrong direction and not in alignment with your values. That is why svadhyaya is integral to the practice of yoga.

When we are doing physical practice on our mat, svadhyaya might look like paying attention to how the choices we make in terms of when to use props, when to rest, when to modify affect how we feel after the practice. If we feel energized and light, we are probably moving in the right direction. If our body feels overworked and drained, there might be things we need to shift in how we are approaching the practice.

In our daily lives off the mat, svadhyaya is considering where we are putting our time and energy and whether those activities are moving us towards our higher goals and purpose and if our actions are in alignment with our values.

Tapas: Self-discipline

In the first aphorism of the second pada of Patanjali’s Yoga Sutras, he explains the 3 “kriyas,” or actions required for one on the spiritual path of yoga. The first of these is “tapas” which translates to something like self-discipline. This is the intensity, commitment, and passion that drives us to keep working steadily towards our goals. It is an important pillar because we can’t expect growth and transformation to come about if we don’t show up for our practice with consistency.

But what does it mean to “practice yoga”? Our practice can be different things on different days. You don’t necessarily need to roll out your yoga mat and commit to an hour of physical practice every day. It is great if you can, but certain times in our lives might require us to use our time in different ways. Some days your yoga practice might be 5 minutes of meditation in a hotel room. Other days your yoga practice might include reading spiritual texts that cause you to introspect and reflect on your behaviors in the world. Some days your yoga practice might be a sweaty vinyasa flow, working out the kinks in your physical body and breathing deeply. And other days, your yoga practice might be sitting down for a heart-to-heart conversation with a friend or family member in need and being fully present with them. All of that is yoga practice when it is done with intention and presence.

The self discipline that is necessary on the yogic path doesn’t need to be rigid or harsh but it does need to be consistent. I love the idea of committing to 10 min of spiritual practice each day. On the days you have time to do more, DO IT! But on the days you don’t, savor those 10 min. It might be 5 min of meditation and 5 min of reading something uplifting. Make a commitment to 10 min (or more) a day and see how it improves your mental health and well-being.

“The irony of commitment is that it’s deeply liberating - in work, in play, in love. The act frees you from the tyranny of your internal critic, from the fear that likes to dress itself up and parade around like rational hesitation. To commit is to remove your head as the barrier to your life.” Anne Morris

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